Good night, Jake.

When you wake up, please find below my suggestions for your consideration for your DRAFT.

I loved this poem's message!!

PLEASE NOTE:

If you receive a few notifications…

I replied to your Draft but it’s not working properly. I immediately deleted my reply because I did not expect it to actually publish as a post.

Have to bring this to Medium’s attention.

——

NOTES

She cut her hair!!! Now I understand the ShortLong reference.

For women to cut or colour their hair is an act of opposition, defiance and a marking of their liberty. And, she went to the barber, for the male cut. Usually, women will go to the hairstylist. So, the word, “barber”, caught my eye.

Subtitle: I didn’t catch the sunrise/sunset aspect as much as her action (haircut) which changed everything.

That was in her control. The sunrise and sunset are not. It empowers her to focus on her choice/actions that result in a rainbow.

The universe smiled (rainbow) because she did what was right for her — walked away from an empty decade with someone who could not love her for who she was. The relief after the storm.

Punctuation:

Know this is a draft, and sending these for your consideration :)

confident and maverick (remove comma)

— can’t fuck with her no more. (add a long hyphen for emphasis)

no tears, but why the cold chills? (add question mark)

Only reminiscence could tell. (capital ‘O”)

The mid-August (hyphen)

burning her long, auburn hair (comma)

just sheer exhaustion or, rather (comma)

an empty decade comes to an end. (lowercase A + change verb tense).

Take care!! :)